exile in girlville

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #39

Song: Ain’t No Sunshine (Download)
Artist: Bill Withers
Album: Just As I Am

Key Lyric:

Hey, I ought to leave the young thing alone
But ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone
Only darkness everyday

Commentary:

The weather has been very temperamental these past few weeks, with intermittent rain, and this all serves as a reminder of how cruel Mother nature can be at times. Ain’t No Sunshine is another song that focuses on this topic of weather and juxtaposes it with emotional suffering.

The song was written by Bill Withers, and he explains his inspiration for the song:

“I was watching…Days Of Wine And Roses, with Lee Remick and Jack Lemmon. They were both alcoholics who were alternately weak and strong. It’s like going back for seconds on rat poison. Sometimes you miss things that weren’t particularly good for you. It’s just something that crossed my mind from watching that movie, and probably something else that happened in my life that I’m not aware of.”

The best part of this song is when Withers sings “I know” x 26 times. Originally he only put that portion of the song as a place holder for future lyrics he was going to pen. However, after Booker T. Jones and other esteemed musicians told him to leave it be, he shrugged and complied. I think the repetition highlights the conflicting views of the narrator, and how he knows better than to focus on the past, but he can’t help but prevent himself from doing so.

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #38

Song: She Can’t Change (Download)
Artist: Neva Dinova
Album: The Hate Yourself Change

Key Lyric:

If it’s too hard be honest
We don’t wanna face it

Commentary:

Somehow in relationships, people always believe that the other person is willing to change for them. Or do we trick ourselves into believing that we can change for others?

All I know is I spent a lot of time honestly believing that things could change for the better in spite of what happened in the past.

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #37

Song: I Want You (Download)
Artist: Elvis Costello & The Attractions
Album: Blood & Chocolate

Key Lyric:

It’s the stupid details that my heart is breaking for
It’s the way your shoulders shake and what they’re shaking for

Commentary:

En-route to pickup my two other buddies for dudes night out on the evening of Valentine’s Day is a pretty awesome thing already. Add to that the fact that this song by Elvis Costello comes onto the radio, and you have a perfect omen of the good things to come that night.

The opening verse of this song starts off in an almost like a formulaic folk/country-like about a breakup. As he sings “Oh my baby baby, I love you more than I can tell, I don’t think I can live without you…”, Elvis Costello sounds nostalgic and wistful as he recounts a tale of a romance gone sour. There is nothing creepy or dark about his tone of voice, although you can sense a tad bit of loneliness and longing.

Then all of a sudden there is a twangy guitar riff, and the mood of the song turns dark and unpleasant in the blink of an eye. Elvis Costello has always had the bitter woman hating attitude solidified in his songs and persona, but in “I Want You” he goes further than even when Sting or Phil Collins channel their inner stalker alter-egos.

This nearly 7 minute long song just gets progressively creepy and demented and when he sings “I’m afraid I won’t know where to stop”, he truly means it. Especially when the lyrics that follow that statement juxtapose two conflicting feelings: “I want to hear he pleases you more than I do / I want you / I might as well be useless for all it means to you.” Just the way he says “I Want You” and how the statement is sandwiched between the other two lines is downright disturbing.

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #36

Song: Walk In The Park (Download)
Artist: Beach House
Album: Teen Dream

Key Lyric:

The face that you saw in the door isn’t looking at you anymore
The name that you call in its place isn’t waiting for your embrace
The world that you love to behold cannot hold you anymore

Commentary:

Another band makes a repeat visit on this list. And goddamn this song is heartbreaking. That guitar + organ combo, mixed with the vocals and the lyrics make for an especially gloomy walk in the park. I wouldn’t be surprised if the person decided to just off themselves in that park. Walk straight into a lake, or hang themselves by that oak tree. And then the next morning, have one of those CSI dudes come by and make a witty comment about your corpse.

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #35

Song: Can’t Get Over You (Download)
Artist: Vivian Girls
Album: Everything Goes Wrong

Key Lyric:

So you wanna make time for cheating
Cause I can’t stop my heart from beating
Just come on back to me baby
You’re so messed up it’s making me crazy

Commentary:

While a certain other band stated “I Don’t Want To Get Over You”, the Vivian Girls clearly state here that they “Can’t Get Over You”.

This song is their attempt at making a classic 60’s sounding pop song, complete with laughable lyrics and very simple chords and progressions. I would go so far as to even call it somewhat of a torch song. Still sometimes I enjoy lamenting over these feelings of unrequited love over strummed bar chords, a steady drum beat and a monotone vocal delivery.

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #34

Song: For No One (Download)
Artist: The Beatles
Album: Revolver

Key Lyric:

Your day breaks, your mind aches
There will be times when all the things
she said will fill your head
You won’t forget her

Commentary:

Okay, so in Catholic theology, limbo is described as a place in between heaven and hell. It has been 8 months now, and I still feel like I am in relationship limbo. Lately I have become a self loathing drunkard at a much more alarming frequency, with no prospects in sight.

With lyrics such as “She wakes up, she makes up / she takes her time and doesn’t feel she has to hurry / she no longer needs you”, I can’t help but feel like a worthless chump. Thanks a lot, McCartney, for making me feel like a piece of shit.

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #33

Song: You Fooled With The Wrong Guy (Download)
Artist: Beulah
Album: Yoko

Key Lyric:

I’ve got the biggest heart
You’ve ever torn apart
You fooled with the wrong guy

Commentary:

Beulah is the first band on this list to receive the award for repeat offender. However, compared to their earlier tune on my list, this one is much more somber. This was because Yoko was the album that followed The Coast Is Never Clear and it had a very bittersweet sound to it because the band was headed towards splitsville. This song also continues my recent streak of songs that border towards feelings of bitterness and disillusionment.

The song is about a protagonist who has been somehow wronged by a former lover. You get a sense from his descriptions that there were obstacles in their relationship that caused a rift between the two. The protagonist dryly mocks her and calls into question her actions that lead to the dissolution of their relationship.The best part of the song is when the protagonist coldly states “You fooled with the wrong guy…” and you can sense deep rooted and bitter resentment in his delivery. This brings into question the dual interpetations that I have hypothesized from the title phrase of the song;

a) The simple on the surface interpretation is that the aformentioned woman fooled around with another guy, thus breaking the protagonist’s heart.

b) Or perhaps the protagonist is also stating that she was foolish to mess with him (by fooling around with another guy)

Based on the tone and devliery of the song, I also think that both interpretations lend to some sort of revenge that will be taken upon this heartless woman.

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #32

Song: Heart of Glass / Once I Had A Love (Download / Download)
Artist: Blondie
Album: Parallel Lines

Key Lyric:

Once I had a love and it was divine
Soon found out I was losing my mind
It seemed like the real thing but I was so blind
Mucho mistrust
Love’s gone behind

Commentary:

While we’re in the realm of songs from the 70’s, might as well revisit this gem from Blondie. I was surprised to find out that there were two versions of this song.

The song was originally released as “Once I Had A Love” in 1975 and had a drastically different sound then the song it would go onto become, “Heart of Glass”. Fans cried sellout when they heard “Heart of Glass” had adopted a disco radio friendly feel to it, but I tend to like both versions of the song. For all it’s worth, I think “Heart of Glass” is a bizarre song due to it’s shifting disco dancefloor beat, and it’s lyrics with such terms as “Mucho mistrust”.

Note to self: Never try to sing this at karaoke again. No matter how drunk you are, you will not be able to pull off those falsetto high notes. Seriously.

Bonus:

“Once I Had A Love” by Blondie. This is the original version of the song that was released in 1975, and had much more of a sultry bluesy rendition.

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #31

Song: How Can You Mend A Broken Heart (Download)
Artist: Al Green
Album: Let’s Stay Together

Key Lyric:

I can think of younger days when living for my life
Was everything a man could want to do
I could never see tomorrow, but I was never told about the sorrow

Commentary:

Okay so I admit my choices thus far in songs have been a bit one sided in terms of genre choice. I also admit that it looks strange since February is Black History Month, but I swear there’s no correlation between these two.

This lovely song is often overshadowed by that other song on the album. You know, the one that the album is named after. Anyways, this song was originally written by some combination of the Gibb brothers from BeeGees, but I feel like Al Green soulful rendition of this song truly resonates a lot more strongly with those of us that are still incapable of moving on. This song also marks another song on the list that makes direct mention of the weather in relation to the emotional stability of a person, see a recurring theme here?

Bonus:

THE FRIGGIN’ BEEGEES!

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #30

Song: For What Reason (Download)
Artist: Death Cab for Cutie
Album: We Have The Facts And We’re Voting Yes

Key Lyric:

I will hold a candle up to you to singe your skin.
Brace yourself: I’m bent with bitterness. I can’t forsee.

Commentary:

Who would have known that the current spouse of Zooey Deschanel would have been able to write such a scathing song about an ex-lover?

I myself go through phases of forgiveness or intense bitterness and resentment. Just two weeks ago I thought I was ready to make the transition from bitter and mopey to content and accepting. But of course, things do happen.

With the opening line declaring that “This won’t be the last you’ll hear from me: it’s just the start”, Gibbard establishes a hostile verbal barrage on his previous partner and does not relent for the rest of the song. While I may not be on that level of insanity yet, I have pondered, is it better to just keep quiet and fade away from her memory completely or try to inflict as much damage as possible on my way out via methods of cruel and unusual punishment?

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #29

Song: Two More Years (MSRKRFT Remix) / (Download)
Artist: Bloc Party
Album: Two More Years

Key Lyric:

In two more years, my sweetheart, we will see another view
Such longing for the past for such completion
What was once golden has now turned a shade of grey
I’ve become crueler in your presence

Commentary:

Time for a flashback to the past. Sometime during the second year of my college, I began to think about how this song embodied my predicament at the time. I figured if I could make it through sophomore year of a long distance relationship during my college years, things would only get easier. It would only be two more years, and we would be out of college, ready to resume our lives together. Of course I was terribly wrong, but who can blame me, I was naive and idealistic at the time.

Singer Kele Okereke explains that the song is about “trying to remind someone that you care about that although the situation you’re in might be difficult, it won’t last forever. That can be hard when you’re caught up in something, but it is about trying to get some perspective on what’s actually happening.”

This remix by MSTRKRFT really focuses on the frenetic guitar sound and this perfectly captures this back and forth notion of questioning a relationship. Looking back on it, this version of the song really highlights the disillusionment and inner conflict as hinted by the lyrics rather than offering a glimpse of hopeful optimism.

Bonus:

The original version of the song for your viewing pleasure. Also the song is a bit more mellow.

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #28

Song: Sometimes (Download)
Artist: My Bloody Valentine
Album: Loveless

Key Lyric:

Close my eyes
Feel me now
I don’t know maybe you could not love me now

Commentary:

While doing research for this column, I often come across many different lyrics pages and Wikipedia entries for songs. For most of the songs on my list, you can almost guarantee at least one commenter will explain how the aforementioned song changed their lives or how they were brought to tears at first listen. I usually scoff at these comments or cannot fathom how these people are so emotionally fragile.

However, after coming across this song, I realized I am not much different from those that I openly mock. During the period where I found out details that suggested that my relationship was beginning to go awry, I began to listen heavily to My Bloody Valentine’s album Loveless, at dangerously high volumes of course. During the period where it became ever so apparent that my relationship was definitely going down the drain, I once again revisited this album. And now that I have reason to believe that my ex has moved on and begun to make progress in her love life, I have once again returned to this album for comfort.

What is the reason for my revisiting this album over and over? One reason why I love this album so much is because it wasn’t tainted by my failed relationship. My previous significant other was never into any of the music from my library that tended to have noisier tendencies and while I was disappointed at the time for her lack of interest in one of my favorite albums of all time, I am currently thankful that subsequent listens of this song will not send me into a vegetative state and leave me curled up in the fetal position (i.e. “This Must Be The Place (Naive Melody)” by Talking Heads, seriously play this song if you want me to be an emotional wreck).

For some reason this song just feels as if it captures the cyclical nature of a relationship perfectly; first the blissful feelings of discovering a love, followed by fear and trepidation of the relationship not working out, and then feelings the emptiness and withdrawal that results from the breakup and departure from one another before the song simply ends with isolation and loneliness.

Bonus:

This song was featured in Sofia Coppola’s film Lost in Translation, and I remember being very impressed with how the song was used to display the disorientation experienced at the point in the film.

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #27

Song: Things Ain’t Like They Used To Be / (Download)
Artist: The Black Keys
Album: Attack and Release

Key Lyric:

And all those happy times are gone
But it doesn’t mean a thing to me
It doesn’t mean a thing to me
And it’s about time you see
That things ain’t like they used to be

Commentary:

Going through this past holiday season was quite hellish. This was the first time in the past four years, that I had to spend the winter break as a single man. Of course I tried to busy myself, by going on a 500 mile bike trip in the dead of winter, from Southern California to Northern California. But alas, that emotional exodus only lasted 8 days, and I had to return back to the real world at some point.

After that I spent the holiday season trying to shuffle amongst my various friends, in an attempt to detract attention from my all too apparent loneliness. Of course that plan backfired, as I ended up hanging out with 7 different couples during this time, and became the self proclaimed master of third wheelin’.

This song is simply a reminder to myself, that I can’t expect things to be the way they were before, and it’s about time I get used to flyin’ solo.

Songs I Probably Shouldn’t Listen To #26

Song: You’ve Really Got A Hold On Me / Bring it On Home To Me
Artist: The Zombies
Album: The Zombies

Key Lyric:

I wanna leave you
don’t wanna stay here
don’t wanna spend another day here

Commentary:

This was originally a song my Smokey Robinson and The Miracles, but I truly believe that this version by The Zombies is the best. It has also been covered by The Beatles (I like Lennon’s voice in this version), Small Faces (very soulful mod sound to it), Thao Nguyen (very folky), and She & Him (I don’t care too much for this version, sorry Zoeey). What truly separates this cover from the others is the seamless incorporation of Sam Cooke’s “Bring it on Home To Me” at the end of the song.

This song really emphasizes the woefullness towards the end of my relationship. I was definitely torn between love and hatred and moving very quickly between the two extremes. Not a good place to be in.

The lyrics “Though you treat me badly, I love you madly, you really got a hold on me” demonstrate perfectly how much I was manipulated by my own feelings. I spent a long time believing that I could truly work things out. The song continues along with the sentiment “I wanna leave you, don’t wanna stay here, don’t wanna spend another day here”, which is basically how I felt towards the inevitable end. The song retreats back to the recurring theme of the narrator facing more internal conflict and not being able to leave as he sings “Though I wanna split now, I can’t quit now”. The only difference is that I was finally able to end it and walk away and quit for good.